a date with Valerie

Date With Valerie.
Those of you that were digital in 2010 even before the promulgation of the new constitution might be aware of a site that used to run by the name 2go that was very similar to the modern day whatsapp.
During that time I procured a digital Samsung phone ready to explore the world and interact with the people on this digital platform that had been so hyped by Stitchy Stitch and John Bosco Onyango.
I was quick off the blocks and even before I knew it I had hit it with a super lady by the name of Valerie from Nairobi chat room 2. She would mms me her photos and my friends agreed that I had struck gold there.
I quickly constituted a team to address this matter and after serious deliberations I was advised to set up a date with her. I planned the long journey from the intestines of Kimilili to Nairobi city. I boarded mvumilivu safaris thanks to Baba alias Fa Fanguch Hercules for giving me the two way bus fare. I would be picked at Machakos country bus by Nacnad Mzii alias Syllable Rhymes.
I arrived in the city awed by the towering sky scrapers and the street lights,the naked chicken dancing on the fast food joints display windows.
After refreshing myself I headed to national archives under the guidance of Mzii to meet my Valerie. She had informed me via text message that she was at the entrance wearing a black trouser and a green top. When we arrived my excitement could not be matched,I felt like a conquerer,a firm believer of the slogan "YES WE CAN "
I quickly scanned the area and saw some green top. I put my phone on the ear,sweetened my voice and said " Hello bby look behind you" The lady in green turned around to face my direction, wearing a humongous smile. I don't know what happened first, my screaming or my taking off. I somehow found myself aboard a yellow City hopa bus having mistaken it for mvumilivu safaris. The lady that I saw was no lady,a huge round face full of acne that would rival a scarecrow. Her dental formula had stepped aside and her breasts ..... the less I talk about them the better.