How long has it been since we talked? 2 weeks? I was busy chasing after your co wives but that is not important for now. I have prepared several commandments for you....
1. I am the only one allowed to sleep around, get lipstick all over my shirt collar and receive late night calls ...
2. Your brothers and sisters are not welcomed to my house without a 45 day notice (handwritten in that case)
3. You are prohibited from talking to a Pastor, a gynaecologist or any other man in a cunning profession without my express permission. It is a taboo.... you will be charged with treason a crime punishable by death.
4. That seat near the door is strictly my personal chamber. Nobody is allowed to even contemplate having his hindquarters there. You will be divorced and charged with indecent behavior / malicious damage of property.
5. Never ever put on a T-shirt when coming to bed. Wear them when you head to the farm or to see your ageing mother in the village.New Article Posted Here Dear Future wife here are 5 basic things you should know
I will make money not for us but for me,myself and I. Let me enjoy my sweat, get my Manchester United Jersey autographed by Ryan Giggs, snatch a lady from Gareth Bale (after all he is not handsome ) eat snakes and snails in Hong Kong, watch the sunset in Sydney ,drink lager with Mugabe, get broke while seducing Taylor Swift, sell the family hacienda and use the money to gamble in Las Vegas then get deported back home and you will organize a great homecoming party for me,be an obedient wife and bring a choir to sing for me all the way from the airport. Wasted on my deathbed I will again ask you to be loyal and hire a chartered plane to fly me to my last destination, Israel. I will then die peacefully and haunt any man who tries to admire before my reincarnation as a duck.